From the River to the Green

TERF Times would like to offer warmest congratulations to “Proud anti-Zionist trans woman” Eleanora Ní Chualáin, also known as Eleanora Sophie Folan, who made history yesterday by becoming the Green Party’s first male to be elected as the female representative for the East of England.

According to Stats for Lefties, the polling-analysis account he runs, Folan won the coveted woman spot by six votes, 784 to 778.

Folan is following in the size 10s of many trailblazing trans activists before him. First amongst these was Aimee Challenor who became the Green Party’s Equalities spokesperson and made a bid for the deputy leadership. Challenor withdrew in 2018 after it emerged that he had employed his father as an election agent while the latter was facing charges for the rape and torture of a child in the attic of the house they shared. David Challenor was subsequently jailed for 22 years.

Folan now joins a flourishing Green sisterhood of men that includes Scottish Green MSP Iris Duane and Green councillors Elaine Gallagher, Raphael Hill, Jenny Knight, Eden Hills and Amy Kirkby-Taylor. 

The Green Party Council (GPC) now gets to enjoy Folan’s presence as he gambols freely among his own kind, safe at last from the twin horrors of misgendering and public ridicule. Here he can shape governance, policy and strategy while remaining gloriously unburdened by reality.

Folan is an impressively conformist radical, both in opinions and outfits. He’s put the work in, announcing his victory beneath a photograph of himself with patchy blue hair, pink headphones and swathed in the compulsory keffiyeh. The IKEA Blåhaj, gaming chair and box of tissues were presumably just out of shot. 

“I know there will be Zionists reading this who are utterly furious that I won,” he declared. “I welcome their hatred.” Nothing says Green Party peace-and-love quite like rolling around in other people’s contempt like Heather Herbert in a women’s loo. 

In the same statement he vowed to honour his manifesto pledge to support members “attacked and smeared by the feral Zionist press.” 

Thanking the Greens for Palestine for offering support for his campaign he said:

“I look forward to working with comrades on GPC to build a radical anti-imperialist Green Party - one that always stands shoulder-to-shoulder with queers, Palestinians, disabled people, migrants, refugees and activists enduring state repression. Inshallah we will prevail.” 

Earlier this year Folan dismissed the party’s antisemitism crisis as an “entirely constructed moral panic” cooked up by “the Zionist lobby,” signed off with “victory to the Iranian nation” and “abolish Israel,” and later posted “Glory to the Iranian resistance” against the “imperialist dogs of the USA.”

But despite his hatred of “zionists” Folan has found room for other hobbies. He has claimed British cops “shoot people all the time,” campaigns against prisons, and insists that celebrating British culture “literally does” make one racist. “All of Britain’s ‘accomplishments’ were built on racism and imperialism,” he helpfully explained while objecting to a schoolgirl who wore a Union flag dress to class. Predictably, Folan is also enthusiastic about the medicalisation of children who believe they’re trans, falsely claiming affirmation reduces suicidal ideation.

His views on the environment are less well known.

TERF Times looks forward to following Folan’s career. We sincerely hope it will encompass a goodwill tour of the Middle East, where he can explain the finer points of queer liberation to the ummah in person.

Peace be upon him.